I’ve been reading a couple of newsletters where the authors are debating what you should say to open a conversation with somebody you don’t know.
Now maybe it’s just me being a bit cynical but the authors seem to be trying to suggest that you use complicated and intrusive ways to start talking to people.
For instance, they suggest, “What’s been your biggest success to date?” or “What’s one of the biggest goals you have?“.
Now, if somebody came up to me and chose to start with either of those as an opening gambit I would think that they were, at the very least, downright rude and maybe a sandwich or two short of a picnic!
Personally, I don’t believe you need to ever have a conversation opener other than something like, “Hello, my name is Winston Marsh, what’s yours?”
It’s a pretty easy question for most people to answer, it’s not particularly offensive and most people love the sound of their own name. Generally they will respond with their name to which you can reply, “That’s great Bob so where do you come from?“ or “Fantastic Mary, and what business are you in?“
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Neither of those questions are particularly inquisitive and they are certainly not as offensive but they are easy to respond to and get a conversation going.
So, please when you meet me for the first time, don’t open the conversation with “So what are your hopes, aspirations and dreams for the next five years?“
I find that sort of approach overly inquisitive and I’m certainly not going to share my thoughts with somebody I don’t really know!
It’s simple really. Just be interested in them, ask them an easy question and look at them with smiling eyes as you wait for their answer.
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