Well, I don’t know about you, but when I was a kid my mum taught me a thing called manners and the teaching has remained with me all of my life… and, more importantly, been practised by me ever since.

There were rules like “Don’t speak with your mouth full”, “If you haven’t got anything nice to say about them, don’t say anything” and “Leave doors and gates (for the country folk) as you found them!”

It seems that very few people were taught that last one or, if they were, have forgotten it since!

We were having brunch in a smart cafe the other Sunday and, being Melbourne, the entrance door was closed to keep the place cosy warm. And I guarantee that around 90 percent of the people who opened that door to enter or leave left the damned door open!

Such little thought or concern. However, I reckon if they’d been sitting where we were sitting they would have been yelling at incoming or departing guests, “Shut the damned door!”

Reminds me of something else my mother impressed on me, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you!”

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By the way, the real pearler, which was a very big worry for me as a kid was the axiom that, “Before you go to play make sure you put on clean nickers because the ambulance man might not take you if you have dirty knickers…”

Struth that worried me! Fancy, bleeding to death because of a skid mark!